Transparency

It is an important quality in any good relationship. It is what I am aiming for in starting this blog. Since I have given my life to Christ, He has continued to remind me that my life is no longer my own. I believe God gives each of us gifts, talents, and abilities to use to glorify him. On a quest for what gift I had been given that I might use for this purpose, I came to a realization: each moment, each breath, is a gift. My story is something, that left to my own choice, I would rather keep to myself. Yet, I am not my own; 1 Corinthians 6:20 reminds me that I was bought at a price. Because so great a debt (Jesus Christ’s death for the forgiveness of my sins) was paid to give me this redeemed life, I feel the rights to the story of my journey are not mine to hold.  If I want to glorify God with what He has gifted me, and be used to help others, I must learn to be transparent. I must learn to let my light shine, rather than “hide it under a bushel.”

I want to be a giver. I want to encourage you with the hope I have found; I want you all to come to the realization that you are not alone. I want to show you that when you choose to give your life to the giver of life, He doesn’t waste a thing. Every experience you have gone through, every heartache, every seemingly insignificant moment, is used, past, present, and future, to develop you as a person. This is how God molds you into your final product, all finite moments working together to build a beautifully unique story. I am confident that “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ” Philippians 1:6. The story of your life is one that no one else will ever have. Your distinct experiences and moments, the big ones and the mundane, are one of a kind events that will only happen once, ever, in the history of mankind. Isn’t that crazy to think about? Isn’t it all the more reason to live intentionally, thinking about each action, each choice that we make? You will never happen again; you can never get time back once it is gone.

Still, it is so scary to be real about who we are, and what we have been through. I have been putting off what I feel is a calling to write for that very reason. I get nervous every time I think about the stories I feel I should share. It takes real risk to be vulnerable, and to put your personal life out there for others to know. Fear of rejection often keeps us hiding, and putting on our best face for others. This pretending is taught to us from an early age. We often learn to be someone different in the lime light, and keep our family matters private. Never let others know your weaknesses, lest they use them against you, right? The question, “how are you?” is often met with a forced smile and a resolved “fine, and you?” Of course we never actually mean to know how the other person is. We don’t want to move into their lives, or invade their privacy.

Why is it that we don’t want to let others in? Why do we feel we can’t be human with each other, and let the truth of our flaws, and weaknesses be known? It is hard, but these flaws, these struggles, they are teaching me something; I have learned they are useful. And it is that “something” I now feel compelled to reveal. I don’t want to be known by my “I’ve got it all together and everything is great” front. I want to be known as someone who lived unafraid of rejection, unafraid of letting others in, and of fully giving and receiving love. So I will tell my story of redemption and hope. I’ll be transparent about the good, the bad, and even the ugly along the way. I will share with you the truth I have found. I do this with the hope that in telling my story, you will not feel alone, and you will feel able to tell yours. I hope you will journey with me as I seek to show you how not a thing has been wasted in my life, and I hope you will begin to see how not a thing is wasted in your own.

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About notathingwasted

Jill is a former art and English teacher turned stay at home mom to three wonderful gifts. She is a "coaches wife" to her high school sweetheart, a talented teacher and mentor. Most importantly she is a child of the one true king, accepted, beloved and chosen.
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